Saturday, November 21, 2009

Confessional #2

I don't want to lie, or exaggerate, or garnish the truth. This challenge is hard. Once again, I have become overwelmingly behind in my reading. I look at how much I need to read, and my heart stops for a moment. Now, I don't want to deter anyone from doing something like this. The rewards are immeasurable if you buckle down and ask the Holy Spirit to teach you. In the last week and a half....I haven't buckled down whatsoever. I have a legitimate excuse though, I am in the fall musical and have had 3+ hours rehearsals everyday for what seems like forever. I know I shouldn't use that as my excuse, but that's what it is.

I hate seeing how much I have to read. I hate not reading my Bible. In the last 2 weeks, I've noticed a change in myself too, since I haven't been putting my nose in the Word. I hate it. I hate not seeing myself draw closer to Christ. I hate not being able to truely worship him. I hate feeling distant from Him. I hate feeling lukewarm. I hate it. I know that once the musical is over, I will have time again, but will I make time to catch myself back up? I don't know. Next week is Thanksgiving, maybe I'll be thankful for electricity as I read untill the wee hours of the morning. If any of you readers get a chance, pray for me this week, it's a long road ahead.

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